


Brothers We Shall Always Be

by orphan_account



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - College/University, Fraternities & Sororities, M/M, Recreational Drug Use
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-03-23
Updated: 2013-03-23
Packaged: 2017-12-06 06:28:50
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,805
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/732484
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Louis and Zayn are best friends and co-presidents of their fraternity. Louis is in love with Harry, the president of their rival fraternity, but Louis' been playing pranks on him ever since freshman year, so Harry really kind of hates him. Zayn  just wants to get drunk and sleep with Niall.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Brothers We Shall Always Be

**Author's Note:**

> I don't even know where this came from. 
> 
> Fair warning that the only thing I know about fraternities is that they always gave me free beer during my freshman year. I apologize for any inaccuracies in my portrayal of them.
> 
> I don't own One Direction and, to the best of my knowledge, none of these events actually happened. But they could have. You never know.
> 
> Also I'm very, very American, and so I'm pretty sure this fic kind of turned out to be in a weird universe with an American college lifestyle where they refer to soccer as 'football'. Oh well.
> 
> EDIT: this fic has been translated into Polish [here](http://ops-and-hi.tumblr.com/post/76111496424/brothers-we-shall-always-be-larry-ziall-one-shot)

“He’s got four nipples, Zayn. _Four_.”

Louis woke him up at 9 A.M on a Saturday to talk about Harry’s nipples. Zayn would be pissed about this if it wasn’t such a regular occurrence. Last week, he was woken up in the middle of the night because Louis wanted to make a pros and cons list about Harry’s dimples. The week before that, Louis came into the bathroom while Zayn was showering to debate whether or not he liked it when Harry wore beanies.

“That’s weird.”

“No, Zayn, it’s perfect. He’s got four nipples. That means he’s got two extra nipples! Oh my god, Zayn, do you think the extra ones are more sensitive? They’re not as big as the other two normal ones, but they’re still perfect. He’s perfect. I want him. Zayn, I want him and all of his nipples.”

“Wait, when did you get the chance to see his nipples?”

“Earlier this morning I was on my way to the coffee cart on the quad because I knew you’d be a little hungover and you’d need a pick-me-up--”

“So where’s my coffee, then?”

“Oh. I forgot to get it. Anyways, I saw him. On the quad. Playing football. Shirtless. Zayn, he wasn’t wearing a shirt!”

“That’s generally what shirtless means.”

“And then I saw them!”

“The nipples?”

“Yes, the nipples! He’s got two normal ones, in the normal spot, but then he’s got two more, and oh my god, Zayn, I want to lick them.”

Louis then starts waxing poetic about the many uses of four nipples, and Zayn finally just tunes him out. All he really wants to be doing is getting high and maybe going over to Niall’s for a shag. More than that, though, he wants Louis to finally be happy. Zayn remembers their first big rush event freshman year, remembers meeting Niall for the very first time, remembers Niall introducing Louis and him to his friend Harry, remembers the look on Louis’ face when he realized he was well and truly fucked. Louis and Harry seemed to really hit it off that night, and they were all secret smiles and laughs in the corner of the room. Unfortunately, his best friend is a complete and utter idiot.  Louis has the emotional capacity of a rock sometimes, he swears, and that means that Louis thought the best way to keep Harry’s attention was to mercilessly tease him and pull pranks on him for the past four years.  Harry sort of hates Louis now, with the _‘passion of a thousand fiery suns’_ as he once so eloquently put it.

To make matters worse, because apparently the universe likes to be an ironic bitch, Louis and Zayn were initiated into Delta Tau Delta while Niall and Harry were initiated into Sigma Phi Epsilon. Zayn and Niall somehow found a way to remain fuck buddies even with the long-standing rivalry between the two fraternities, while Louis somehow found a way to ruin any chances he had with Harry.

“Zayn?”

“Yeah, Lou?”

“Do you think Harry would ever want to be with me?”

Shit. Louis’ got a despondent look on his face and his voice is soft and quiet and unsure, and Zayn _hates_ that because Louis is normally loud and vibrant and Zayn really wants him to go back to talking about nipples and curly hair and beanies.

“Well, mate, you’ve kind of been tormenting him the past four years of his life.”

“I haven’t been _tormenting_ him!”

“There was that one time you put a live chicken in his dorm room, that time you buttered up the floors in the SigEp house, that time you put a tarantula in his car, that other time when-”

“Okay, that’s enough, Zayn. I realize I’ve pulled quite a few pranks on him, but they were all in good fun! It was in the spirit of our fraternities’ rivalry! And it’s not as if he hasn’t pranked me back, I mean remember when he put pink hair dye in my shampoo or that time when he put silly string all around my car?”

“Well, no offense, Lou, but I’m not sure _he_ sees it as friendly rivalry. So, um, maybe you should try being nice to him?”

“Nice. Right. I can be nice! Definitely. I’ll be the nicest person he’s ever met!”

Somehow Zayn doesn’t think this is going to turn out so well.

 

* * *

 

They’re at a campus bar later that night. He’s texted Niall and is hoping he arrives soon, because he needs a good fuck after the day he had. Louis spent nearly four hours thinking (out loud) of ways to be nice to Harry and Zayn spent nearly four hours giving Louis advice while wishing he wasn’t such a good friend. They smoked a bowl before they left the frat house and now Zayn is nursing a bottle of beer while talking to Louis about something _other_ than Harry Styles, so he’s pretty happy.

A little while later the doors open and Niall comes tumbling in, Harry in tow. Unlike Louis, Zayn doesn’t have the urge to write sonnets about any of Niall’s body parts (except maybe his dick), but damn Niall looks good tonight. But then again, Niall always looks good. He’s got his usual khaki shorts, tank, and snapback on, and Zayn really wants to take him to the bathroom and fuck him right now. They make their way over to Louis and Zayn’s table and Niall claims the spot next to Zayn, leaving Harry no choice but to sit next to Louis. Louis looks delighted by this, though, and once Harry’s settled in he turns to him, all bright and loud and _Louis_ , and shouts, “Hiya, Harry!”

Okay, sure, Zayn is the one who told Louis to maybe start being nice to the boy he’s basically in love with, but he’s not sure smiling maniacally at him and yelling in his face the moment he sits down is the right way to do it.

And it’s obviously not, because Harry looks a bit shell-shocked, as if Louis has never said hello to him in his life, and Zayn knows his best friend well enough to know that this is indeed the case. For the past few years, Louis probably greeted Harry with some sort of insult or jab before giving him a wet willy or a purple nurple instead of just saying ‘hi’ like a normal person.

But Louis did pick possibly one of the nicest boys in the entire world to fall in love with, because Harry has every right to ignore Louis or punch him in the face (Louis egged his car only just three days ago) but instead he puts on a slightly unsure smile and says “Hi, Louis.”

Louis looks like he’s just unwrapped his favorite present on Christmas morning, and he smiles so wide and so bright and asks Harry, “So, how’re you today?” and Zayn feels like he’s watching a train wreck, helpless to stop any of it, as Harry closes in on himself and glares at Louis (well, he tries to glare, but any negative emotion on Harry’s face usually just makes him look like an angry kitten).

“What have you done now?”

Louis, for his part, looks confused and a bit hurt, and god, Zayn is best friends with a complete imbecile, because Louis probably doesn’t even understand _why_ Harry would be hesitant to talk to him. When Harry found Louis egging his car on Wednesday night, Louis responded by throwing the rest of the eggs at Harry and running away while screaming ‘DELTA TAU!’ at the top of his lungs. It was hilarious to watch, and Zayn and the rest of the Taus saluted him for his bravery, honor, and dedication later that night, but Zayn’s pretty sure egging is not the best way to convey your undying love and affection for someone.

“I haven’t done anything.”

“You haven’t put itching powder in all my clothes? Haven’t TP’ed the SigEp house while we were out? Haven’t changed my lube to superglue?”

“Harold! I am insulted that you’d think I’d do such a thing!” Zayn doesn’t miss the way Louis gets a calculating look on his face, though, as if he’s already mentally planning on using those pranks on the SigEps at some point in the near future. Zayn loves pulling pranks with Louis and he hates the fucking SigEps, Niall and Harry excluded, and he’s already looking forward to what the next week and next prank war brings.

“You egged my car earlier this week, Louis.”

“You have no proof.”

“…You threw eggs at my face. I had to take five showers to get the smell off of me! I got egg in my eye!”

“All speculation.” They’re both smiling a bit, now, and Harry looks more and more comfortable with every minute that goes by.

Niall turns to Zayn and says “So, I heard the president of Sigma Chi slept with a Tau’s girlfriend? That true?”

Louis turns away from Harry and glares at Niall. “Yes. It’s true. Fucking dick slept with Stan’s girlfriend. Piece of shit. We need revenge on Sigma Chi. They’ll rue the day they decided to fuck with one of my brothers!”

Harry raises his hand like he’s in a classroom or some shit before saying, “Uhm… I have an idea?”

Everyone turns expectantly toward him. “Uhm…well… I just figured that since SigEp and Delta Tau are notorious for being the best pranksters on campus, that maybe we should come together and, like, think of one big epic prank? I mean, I know we’re rivals and all, but I also know that that’s because we’re the two best frats, SigEp being number one and you guys being number two, of course.” Louis lets out an indignant squawk at that, but Harry ignores him and continues on. “So, like, I feel like we could put that aside to come together to prank Sigma Chi. Because, like, fraternities are all about brotherhood and sure, there’s rivalry between frats, but we’re all brothers in a way, and we’re all going through this together, and it totally wasn’t cool of that Sigma Chi dick to sleep with another brother’s girlfriend. So.”

Louis nods gravely. He then gets up suddenly, hops on top of the table, drawing the attention of almost everyone at the bar, and, using an empty bottle as a microphone, says, “The boys of Sigma Chi thought that they could get away with dishonoring the sacred brotherhood, but the _men_ of Delta Tau Delta and Sigma Phi Epsilon, sworn enemies of many millennia, will cast aside their rivalry and come together to let Sigma Chi know that we will not go quietly into the night! We will not vanish without a fight! We’re going to live on, we’re going to survive! And we’re going to prank the shit out of Sigma Chi!”

The entire bar erupts in applause, and Louis takes a bow before saying into his ‘microphone’, “Thank you, thank you so much. I would like to thank my best friend Zayn for always being there for me and for always scoring the best weed. I’d like to thank Niall for always finding the parties with free alcohol. And I’d like to thank Harry for his curly hair and his extra nipples. Goodnight!”

He hops off the table and they don’t settle down and stop laughing for a while. Harry is smiling at Louis like he can’t believe he’s real, and yeah, Zayn thinks, they’re definitely going to be okay. Everything’s going to be alright. Louis will win Harry over eventually. Zayn’s got a cold bottle of beer in his left hand and Niall’s hand in his right, and he’s really fucking happy.

Fuck, he loves his life.

 

* * *

 

“Zayn, he spoke words to me. He smiled at me. I’m one step closer to achieving my destiny, one step closer to touching all four of his nipples!”

It’s 8 A.M. Zayn hates his life.

 

* * *

 

 “The thing about the beanies is they cover up his curls! I love his curls. But his beanies make him look sexy as fuck. He wore a beanie today, I saw him walking to class. I waved at him, because that’s a nice thing to do, and I’m trying to be nice like you said. And he waved back! Zayn, he waved back at me!”

Honestly, Zayn just wants one day that’s free from conversations about fucking Harry Styles and his fucking beanies and dimples and hair and fucking nipples. Fuck.

 

* * *

 

“Actually, I think I prefer when he’s not wearing beanies. Because then he has to run his hands through his hair constantly to tame it. I want to run my hands through his hair. I _need_ to run my hands through his hair!”

Zayn really needs to invest in a pair of earplugs. Or maybe find a new best friend.

 

* * *

 

“He said hi to me today! I didn’t even have to initiate anything, because he said hi first! And then we had a lovely conversation about football and I invited him to the party this weekend. I know he’s the president of SigEp, but he’s really pretty, so I think we can make an exception. That way we can discuss our prank on Sigma Chi. That’s okay, right? Zayn, it’s okay, right?”

“Christ, Louis, I’m trying to take a shite. Leave me alone!”

 

* * *

 

Zayn’s at the house with Louis and the rest of the brothers, and Louis is telling them all about how Niall and Harry and the rest of the SigEps are going to help them prank Sigma Chi. The boys seem pretty cool about it, especially Stan. Louis is giving them a similar version of his epic bar speech, but Zayn’s almost positive that nothing will ever top that.  He hears a knock on the door and opens it to find Niall and Harry. He lets them in and leads them back to the meeting room, where Louis is now emphatically gesturing to get his point across. Zayn looks back at Harry who, for once, isn’t looking at Louis like he’s afraid he’s going to get pelted in the face by a water balloon. He’s just looks happy, amused, and a little bit in awe of the aura that Louis exudes when he’s talking about the things he loves. Zayn’s pretty sure Louis’ excellent public speaking skills are what scored him the position of co-president of Delta Tau Delta with Zayn, because it’s nearly impossible not to listen to Louis when he’s talking.

They take a few hours to think of epic pranks and they all come to the conclusion that the best one would be the water cup prank, where they fill cups with water and place them all on the floor. The moment one of those Sigma Chi douches wakes up and opens his bedroom door, he’ll start a chain reaction that won’t stop until every inch of that house is covered in water. Harry suggests that they somehow tape the whole thing, so that they can laugh about this for years to come, and Stan volunteers to set up cameras around the house while everyone else is placing the cups. Louis lights up at Harry’s suggestion, and Zayn knows that Louis’ favorite things are Harry and pulling pranks, so he guesses that talking to Harry about pulling pranks is Louis’ personal heaven. Zayn loves this, loves the camaraderie he and these boys have, and he definitely loves the fact that Niall and Harry fit here now, too. 

 

* * *

 

They’re in the Sigma Chi house, and it’s taken them nearly three hours to get all of these cups filled with water and placed along every inch of the floor. They need to finish and leave, because it’s almost 6 A.M. and they’re not exactly sure when the earliest riser in the house wakes up, and they really don’t want to be interrupted. Stan has installed a camera in nearly every vantage point so that they don’t miss a single person’s reaction to their epic prank. As they’re moving to the back door, placing cups in the path that they’d left for themselves, Harry gets this devilish look on his face when he sees a can of shaving cream sitting on the counter. He grabs it and they finish placing the rest of the cups. Once outside, Harry runs up to Louis and whispers something in his ear. Louis guffaws and gives Harry a little nod of approval. Harry lights up and runs off to the front of the house, so Zayn and the rest of the brothers follow him to see what he’s up to. Harry starts writing messages on all of their cars in shaving cream, and a small part of Zayn really hopes that shaving cream doesn’t permanently damage cars or anything because fraternity bylaws forbid things like that, but the larger part of him doesn’t really give a shit.

The messages range from things like ‘SIGMA CHI SUCKS’ to ‘WE HAVE TINY PRICKS’ and Zayn is desperately trying to hold in his laughter because he doesn’t want anyone in the house to wake up before they’re completely done. Once Harry’s satisfied with his work, they make their way back to the Tau house and, once safely inside, they all break out in laughter, falling on the floor and only getting up to watch the video of the Sigma Chi douches opening their doors and screaming like little bitches when the water spills everywhere.

Later that night Louis gives everyone a rerun of what happened, stopping to laugh every few minutes, even though they were all there. Harry is listening intently next to Louis and he’s got stars in his eyes and his smile is so wide it hurts to look at. Niall is half on top of Zayn and he’s laughing uproariously and Zayn thinks this is the happiest he’s ever been.

 

* * *

 

“I don’t understand how Harry Styles is a real person that’s real. I mean, he’s just so tall but he’s also clumsy, a bit like a baby giraffe, you know? And he’s so funny and genuine and nice, and I really want to kiss him. I also want to kiss his nipples, but I mostly want to kiss him.”

It’s 7 A.M and Zayn is not happy.

 

* * *

 

“I think I should ask Harry out on a date. But where do you even go on a date? I’m not good at dating, Zayn. I’m good at pranking and football. Do people still eat food on dates? Is that a thing that people do?”

Zayn knew he should have stayed over at the SigEp house.

 

* * *

 

“Fuck. No, I’m not going to ask Harry out on a date. I’m just going to tell him I’m in love with him, and then we can finally fuck and I can also finally lick all of his nipples. I don’t need to wine and dine him first. Now I just need to figure out how to tell him I love him.”

It’s 6 A.M. and Zayn has a midterm in three hours. He’s holding auditions for a new best friend today. Anybody will do, so long as they’re not obsessed with Harry Styles.

 

* * *

 

There’s a huge laser tag tournament thrown by PanHellenic for all of the fraternities every year. As usual, the final game is between Delta Tau Delta and Sigma Phi Epsilon. The Taus are the reigning champions of ten years and Zayn is ready to lead his boys to victory in year eleven. He and Louis have taken up battle positions and are guarding their tower when Louis spots Harry down below. Louis smiles this smile that Zayn can only describe as _fond_. Completely fond and really smitten and totally in love. He shakes his head, takes a deep breath, like he’s steeling himself, and goes to stand up on the tower, ignoring Zayn’s protests. He cups his hands around his mouth and yells, “Hey, Harry Styles! Even though you’re a SigEp, I really fucking love you! And all of your nipples!”

The next few moments are total chaos. Now that Louis gave away the position of their tower, the SigEps storm over and take everyone down to win the game. Zayn would be depressed, because he was destined to lead them to an eleventh victory, _destined_ to, but Louis is frantically climbing down the tower while Harry is sprinting over to him and they drop their laser guns at the same time and leap into each other’s arms and it’s like an epic ending to some stupid romantic comedy.

“I really fucking love you too, Louis Tomlinson! Even though you’re a Tau.”

And then they’re kissing and Zayn is laughing and Niall is beside him gloating about his ‘epic victory’ and Zayn shuts him up by kissing him and finds that he’s actually pretty okay with losing laser tag so long as he gets to keep all this.

 

* * *

 

Zayn’s currently under a shady tree on the quad and Niall’s snoring loudly next to him.  Louis and Harry are kicking the football around and they look so happy that it’s strange to think they were basically sworn enemies only a few months ago. That’s not to say that they don’t still prank each other (the other day Harry and Niall busted into his and Louis’ room and woke them up by blasting them with squirt guns), but they laugh about their pranks together now. Harry takes his shirt off when he starts getting warm and Louis immediately tackles him to the ground. Harry lets out a squawk of protest but he’s still like putty in Louis’ hands. Louis starts biting his nipples, says he’s going to _‘save the most sensitive one for last!’_ and Zayn tunes out their conversation and smiles down at Niall as he lets out a particularly loud snore. It sounds weird as fuck, but he’s just so fucking happy that his best friend got to find out which one of Harry’s nipples are the most sensitive. He’s so fucking happy that he and Niall made the transition from fuck buddies to boyfriends and can now sleepover and hold hands while sober and take naps together on the quad. He’s so fucking happy that this is his life, that he’s at this amazing university and is the co-president of the best frat on campus (no matter what Harry and Niall say) and he’s living the dream with his boyfriend and two best friends. He's just really fucking happy.

 

* * *

 

“I’m hungry. As my boyfriend it’s your duty to feed me. You’re also paying because Delta Taus suck.”

It’s 11 A.M. and Zayn would kind of like to be woken up like this every day for the rest of forever.


End file.
